The family of Yonatan Yosef Brand, of blessed memory, who fell in Gaza, has revealed an excerpt from his personal diary written on the eve of Yom Hazikaron 2025. He wrote the entry at the synagogue in Outpost 105 on the Syrian border, where he described his personal thoughts about Memorial Day, sanctity, and devotion to the State of Israel.
At the beginning of the entry, Brand wrote: “Eve of Memorial Day 2025, synagogue, Outpost 105, Syrian border. It’s been a long time since I last wrote; somehow I almost always write in a synagogue and in yeshiva. To me writing is connected to holiness."
He went on to describe the personal difficulty he experiences around Yom Hazikaron and the way he connects to the memory of the fallen. “On Yom Hazikaron I can start crying in an instant. I didn’t want to watch a film in the club now, because it felt too fictional and not really connected to the day. Maybe it isn’t either, but that was my impression from two minutes, and in any case, I didn’t miss anything," he wrote.
He added, “But I really connect to films and articles about the fallen, the emotional connection to them and the certainty that I am now willing to die for Israel, and that this is how one must live. The desire doesn’t always hold up in war, and only there are you tested in how you act, but it is something enormous, even if it is not a point of light for me."
Brand also wrote about his sense of inner lack and his constant striving for growth: “Until my last day, I will feel the lack within me, that I am not able to live 100% according to these values, but I will work and cry over this lack, because only by feeling it, acknowledging it, and being pained by it, without despair and depression that only destroy-will continuous improvement come, and with God’s help I will advance further in order to live this way. It is always difficult for me on this day to feel that I am worthy enough of them, of their devotion and sacrifice."