As we go to the scorecard, we find that there are some 300 million Arabs in and around Israel. Jews? Our worldwide population is also around 300 million.
Oops! No? I'm wrong? Can it be that there are only about 14 million of us, counting Israel, New York, Timbuktu and everywhere else?
But yes, that is a fact, we barely number 14 million, a third of which lives in Israel. So how come there's all this talk about "both sides"?
A few Sundays back, I caught Amos Oz on C-Span TV as he was speaking before a synagogue group, I think it was, somewhere in Washington, DC. I'm not sure because I kept switching to football. It was Sunday, give me a break. Anyway, these were American liberals (or do I repeat myself?) who had come to praise this famous Israeli author, who is also celebrated here in the US and in Europe, as well.
It is no wonder some of us don't get invited to these things, as speakers or as guests, either in DC, New Jersey or California.
In Berkeley, for example, a leading rabbi, Stuart Kelman, advised his congregants to stay home when Bus 19 came to visit, as it might offend Arabs to be reminded that Arabs murdered 11 Israelis and wounded 45 more on that Jerusalem bus, January 2004; the 140th suicide bombing up to that time.
In Kelman's words, the January 16 Rally Against Global Terrorism was sponsored by "Christian Evangelicals and Jews who hold political opinions on the extreme right." Yes, Jews and Christians who wish to defend themselves against a jihad that is sweeping the world are engaged in a great right-wing conspiracy.
Kelman favors "constructive dialogue" with terrorists, such as those with the hoods who did more killing of Jews and Christians just the other day. Constructive dialogue is good. Kelman should go out there where they breed Hamas and give it a try, and when he comes back (Lord willing), he can tell us how it went.
Or perhaps the rabbi can begin his constructive dialogue right there in his own neighborhood, Berkeley, where lovers of terrorism and mixed multitudes of jihad groupies came out to disrupt last Sunday's rally with such chants as "Death to Israel!" and "Death To America!" (Thanks to Cinnamon Stillwell and Lee Kaplan for their straight-up report on all this.)
As for me, I find it difficult to relate to a rabbi like Kelman, or to a writer like Amos Oz, and to those who follow them. These are not my synagogues.
In the morning, they pray from our 2,000-year-old liturgy, the 18 Benedictions, that David's "Jerusalem be rebuilt speedily in our days, as an everlasting edifice." In the evening, these same congregants worship a speaker who insists that Jerusalem must be shared or handed over to terrorists, also speedily in our days.
But Amos Oz did not go to Washington to talk politics; rather to promote his memoirs. However, as an afterthought, he reminded us that "both sides" have equal claims upon the same land. Both sides! Okay, let's do the math, which I flunked, by the way, but I do know something about sports.
"Both sides", to me, means the Atlanta Falcons against the Philadelphia Eagles. Both sides use an equal number of players, 11; reserves and special teams must take their turns, never to exceed 11. Same in baseball, nine players on the field at once. That's what is meant, in my calculation, by both sides.
So how does Amos Oz arrive at both sides when the game is 300 million Arabs against 14 million Jews, or worse, five and a half million Israelis?
This is both sides?
No, it isn't. What it is, as we say in sports, is the Atlanta Falcons doubling their players on the field, 22, up against quarterback Donovan McNabb all alone.
Moreover, the Arabs have a deep bench, meaning, a full complement of substitutes. If one of their players gets hurt, they've got the Islamic league, numbering more than a billion. The Israelis have no league and Israel has no bench. If Israel gets hurt, there is no one to take its place. There is no one even in the locker room to run in as a replacement.
There aren't even any cheerleaders for Israel. Europe fills the bleachers with millions of fans for the Arab side, as, meanwhile, the United Nations and our campuses tag along as valets, water-carriers and roadies. By the way, the Arabs are always the home team. The Israelis are always the visitors.
If it's baseball, Israel gets one player against nine and three strikes, while the other team gets as many balls and strikes as it needs to hit a homerun.
On defense, Israel gets a pitcher. That's enough for the Jews.
Imagine if Sandy Koufax, back in his prime and still with the Dodgers, found himself up against the Yankees with no infield or outfield to back him up and not even a catcher.
Pay attention, please, especially sports fans over in Israel, because here's what happens in America when the manager can't protect his players and keeps making moves that hurt the team.
He gets fired.
In other news:
Was anyone listening?
During the Haj, Saudi Arabia's top cleric, Sheik Abdul-Aziz Al-Sheik, rebuked Islam's youth as a nation "gone astray." He said, "They have spread vice on earth with explosions and destruction of innocents." He asked, "How will you meet God?"
Can't Make This Up Dept:
In all the hoopla over the Inauguration, did anyone else notice President George W. Bush's Cadillac - "Before" and "After"? Before the event, one of our networks ran a feature on that Caddy, how it was more than sleek, but also as sturdy as a tank. Not even a missile could penetrate its flanks. A Caddy spokesman, addressing a company of ogling news people, said a version of this specially-designed Inauguration car would soon be available to the public.
So now, days later, as the motorcade is approaching the White House, the anchorman asks the man on the scene, as I recall it, "Is that a huge dent in the president's car?"
"Yes, that's a dent."
"What happened?"
"Someone hit it with an orange."
Oops! No? I'm wrong? Can it be that there are only about 14 million of us, counting Israel, New York, Timbuktu and everywhere else?
But yes, that is a fact, we barely number 14 million, a third of which lives in Israel. So how come there's all this talk about "both sides"?
A few Sundays back, I caught Amos Oz on C-Span TV as he was speaking before a synagogue group, I think it was, somewhere in Washington, DC. I'm not sure because I kept switching to football. It was Sunday, give me a break. Anyway, these were American liberals (or do I repeat myself?) who had come to praise this famous Israeli author, who is also celebrated here in the US and in Europe, as well.
It is no wonder some of us don't get invited to these things, as speakers or as guests, either in DC, New Jersey or California.
In Berkeley, for example, a leading rabbi, Stuart Kelman, advised his congregants to stay home when Bus 19 came to visit, as it might offend Arabs to be reminded that Arabs murdered 11 Israelis and wounded 45 more on that Jerusalem bus, January 2004; the 140th suicide bombing up to that time.
In Kelman's words, the January 16 Rally Against Global Terrorism was sponsored by "Christian Evangelicals and Jews who hold political opinions on the extreme right." Yes, Jews and Christians who wish to defend themselves against a jihad that is sweeping the world are engaged in a great right-wing conspiracy.
Kelman favors "constructive dialogue" with terrorists, such as those with the hoods who did more killing of Jews and Christians just the other day. Constructive dialogue is good. Kelman should go out there where they breed Hamas and give it a try, and when he comes back (Lord willing), he can tell us how it went.
Or perhaps the rabbi can begin his constructive dialogue right there in his own neighborhood, Berkeley, where lovers of terrorism and mixed multitudes of jihad groupies came out to disrupt last Sunday's rally with such chants as "Death to Israel!" and "Death To America!" (Thanks to Cinnamon Stillwell and Lee Kaplan for their straight-up report on all this.)
As for me, I find it difficult to relate to a rabbi like Kelman, or to a writer like Amos Oz, and to those who follow them. These are not my synagogues.
In the morning, they pray from our 2,000-year-old liturgy, the 18 Benedictions, that David's "Jerusalem be rebuilt speedily in our days, as an everlasting edifice." In the evening, these same congregants worship a speaker who insists that Jerusalem must be shared or handed over to terrorists, also speedily in our days.
But Amos Oz did not go to Washington to talk politics; rather to promote his memoirs. However, as an afterthought, he reminded us that "both sides" have equal claims upon the same land. Both sides! Okay, let's do the math, which I flunked, by the way, but I do know something about sports.
"Both sides", to me, means the Atlanta Falcons against the Philadelphia Eagles. Both sides use an equal number of players, 11; reserves and special teams must take their turns, never to exceed 11. Same in baseball, nine players on the field at once. That's what is meant, in my calculation, by both sides.
So how does Amos Oz arrive at both sides when the game is 300 million Arabs against 14 million Jews, or worse, five and a half million Israelis?
This is both sides?
No, it isn't. What it is, as we say in sports, is the Atlanta Falcons doubling their players on the field, 22, up against quarterback Donovan McNabb all alone.
Moreover, the Arabs have a deep bench, meaning, a full complement of substitutes. If one of their players gets hurt, they've got the Islamic league, numbering more than a billion. The Israelis have no league and Israel has no bench. If Israel gets hurt, there is no one to take its place. There is no one even in the locker room to run in as a replacement.
There aren't even any cheerleaders for Israel. Europe fills the bleachers with millions of fans for the Arab side, as, meanwhile, the United Nations and our campuses tag along as valets, water-carriers and roadies. By the way, the Arabs are always the home team. The Israelis are always the visitors.
If it's baseball, Israel gets one player against nine and three strikes, while the other team gets as many balls and strikes as it needs to hit a homerun.
On defense, Israel gets a pitcher. That's enough for the Jews.
Imagine if Sandy Koufax, back in his prime and still with the Dodgers, found himself up against the Yankees with no infield or outfield to back him up and not even a catcher.
Pay attention, please, especially sports fans over in Israel, because here's what happens in America when the manager can't protect his players and keeps making moves that hurt the team.
He gets fired.
In other news:
Was anyone listening?
During the Haj, Saudi Arabia's top cleric, Sheik Abdul-Aziz Al-Sheik, rebuked Islam's youth as a nation "gone astray." He said, "They have spread vice on earth with explosions and destruction of innocents." He asked, "How will you meet God?"
Can't Make This Up Dept:
In all the hoopla over the Inauguration, did anyone else notice President George W. Bush's Cadillac - "Before" and "After"? Before the event, one of our networks ran a feature on that Caddy, how it was more than sleek, but also as sturdy as a tank. Not even a missile could penetrate its flanks. A Caddy spokesman, addressing a company of ogling news people, said a version of this specially-designed Inauguration car would soon be available to the public.
So now, days later, as the motorcade is approaching the White House, the anchorman asks the man on the scene, as I recall it, "Is that a huge dent in the president's car?"
"Yes, that's a dent."
"What happened?"
"Someone hit it with an orange."