Remember your kids during those impossible teenage years? You gave them protection, entertainment, tried to teach them values, provided education as well as the latest hi-tech devices ? yet, somehow, they rebelled and detested you. Children believe their "parental figures" are usually wrong and often use the occasion to be quite critical. Many Americans, like Colin Powell and Howard Dean, keep thinking, "How can we get all those little European sophisticated, pseudo-intellectual grown-up juveniles to love us?"



Should Americans be surprised that Europeans hate us with such passion? Old Europe, led by France, Germany, Austria, Belgium, Greece, and a few other somewhat childish nations think they know more than the US. They wonder how a much younger country called America can be so advanced morally, technologically, scientifically and societally in comparison to them.



For 400 years, Europe directed world events on a grand scale. Suddenly, they have evolved into political irrelevance. Since European power cannot compete in any manner with American power, and now even feel threatened by Jewish power in Israel, their strategy has changed into tearing down both entities.



A totally weakened Europe shows its strength by developing an innovative plan to save Jews by weakening Israel to its vulnerable pre-1967 days. Since America cannot be diminished in such a manner, the European kindergarten will continue to criticize and belittle every American move. According to Chirac, Schroeder and their legions, evil is not the greatest threat in the world. It is American power, American aggression, environmental degradation, global warming and Israel.



Old Europe selfishly craves their casual lifestyle and security first, not freedom. They worship the safe position and have antipathy for those who stand up for what is right and wrong in the world, especially against Islamic Fundamentalism. Europeans would like nothing better than to sit in outdoor cafes, go to their topless beaches, enjoy long vacations from work, get free government healthcare and pensions, all while not rocking their socialist boat.



Western Europeans contend that America and Israel are just two young countries with very little to teach. They consider themselves smarter and more knowledgeable due to thousands of years of experience. However, an older civilization does not in any way constitute a wiser one; evidence the fact that Europeans seem to ascribe to the Bin Laden manifesto, holding Israel and America as the greatest dangers to the world, not Iran, Libya, Syria or religious fundamentalism.



Beginning in 1948, Europe saw Israel as an outpost of their values. During the last 25 years, Israel has matured into an American outpost, making Israel doubly dangerous; possessing both Jewish and American values. Europeans are angry because Christians (and now Jews) who believe in God have the ultimate power to do good and back it up with overwhelming force. Who the hell do those Americans (and Israelis) think they are without (Third) world agreement and the UN stamp of approval?



Amoral Europe believes in the United Nations, because they do not have a true reference point for right and wrong, unlike religious America and Israel whose Bible dictates terms. Therefore, self-righteous Europeans put their faith in a majority vote for moral decisions. Enter a religious George W. Bush, who believes he knows better than France, Germany and the balance of secular Europe. This Texas cowboy has a silly notion that God is our guide for right and wrong, not Kofi Annan.



Obviously, Chamberlain DNA has infected Europeans with fears of another Hitler arising. The result being that "peace-in-our-time activists" will do whatever is necessary to lessen the danger of war. They conveniently forget that force can be used for good; war stopped the Holocaust and gave Europe its freedom in 1945.



Appeasing the Islamists by weakening Israel and reversing America's unchangeable Middle East policy is their untenable solution. Like children, France and Germany seem to have little dignity. They now want contracts (their allowance) even though they have misbehaved. Americans put their lives on the line to get rid of murderous torture chambers in Iraq, while they made money and were business partners with the evil dictator.



Actually, America happens to be too good to be true. No one could possibly be that decent, or have a true Biblical mission to improve the world. The European cause is to have a good time on this earth, which is the reason churches are empty, but the sex clubs are filled. Simply put, America makes the historic European nations look like whining babies. Children primarily want to be loved and taken care of in their cradle. Europeans go even further with their cradle to grave socialism. When the French, German and Italian unions go on strike, kicking and screaming for new contracts, their governments always capitulate, which is why European farmers command 50% of the EU's operating budget. Americans and Israelis primarily want to do the right thing and make their own breaks economically.



Whenever this child analogy is expressed, Europeans become highly insulted. They quickly point out that the facts on the ground show them to actually be the older, wiser, more mature parents. If their analogy is carried to its conclusion, then our much older parental figures should be viewed in their true condition ? as decrepit elders in need of assisted living care, with senility and Alzheimer's setting in rapidly. These "older" nations no longer seem to make any rational sense and have become quite forgetful of the lessons learned from "past events."



Whether we consider antiquated Europe our children or our parents, it is back to diapers and spitting up, because certainly they can no longer take care of themselves.