Bruce Bialosky, former national treasurer of the Republican Jewish Coalition, has sarcastically suggested that President Obama overcome growing Jewish criticism of his policies on Israel and create a “Latkes Czar" to ensure quality of the potato pancake traditionally associated with the holiday of Hanukkah.
“He can save many Jews a lot of anguish during the upcoming holiday season and possibly lock up the Jewish vote for generations," Bialosky wrote on the TownHall.com website.
“This may not affect the average American, but to Jewish Americans this is of utmost importance. Since the President has done everything possible to antagonize Jews over Israel, I thought he might go for this one… There are some pretty bad latkes out there. Since we wait all year to savor these delectable items, being faced with bad latkes during Hanukkah can ruin the entire holiday season and carry over into the New Year.”
The suggestion of a “Latke Czar” comes on the heels of reports that the president has appointed up to three dozen czars, in charge of an array of issues including closing the Guantanamo Bay detention facility, ending the genocide in Darfur and overseeing intelligence and drug smuggling.
Bialosky wrote, “Their appointments have become very controversial, as there have been complaints about them circumventing the congressional approval and oversight processes. I say damn these naysayers. I have come to embrace this idea despite the fact of being Jewish and having an aversion to Czars."
In addition to a Latke Czar, he suggested a Czar to hand out a guidebook on how to conduct yard sales and restrict the sales of used underwear and socks.
An “Apology Czar would help President Obama correct perceived misbehaviors of America in the past,” Bialosky continued. “For example, he needs to apologize to Spain for the Spanish-American War, to Mexico for accepting Texas into the Union, to France for underpaying for the Louisiana Purchase and to the rest of the world for our basketball team’s performance at the 2004 Olympics.”
A “Saved Jobs Czar” would create “photo ops with plumbers, office workers and engineers who have had their jobs saved by the Anointed One would help our collective psyche. Since President Obama has introduced this new concept of saved jobs, most Americans have been left in the cosmic dust. As the country loses jobs at a clip of about 450,000 per month, it is clear he has not done a good job of communicating about these ‘saved’ jobs.”
Bialosky noted that if President Obama "appoints enough Czars he can solve at least one important problem – unemployment.”