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Migron Evictions: A Wry Look

By Tamar Yonah
9/3/2012, 11:09 AM

This is an 'Interview with  the Security Minister [sic] re: Migron, written by the humorous weekly guest of mine, 'Dan, the Guy Who Works With Leftists'.  
Interview with Minister of Security, Ohad Boreg.
Q: Mr. Boreg, why did the government fund the building of Migron, only to destroy it 5 years later.
A: That's right.
Q:  What do you mean, that's right.
A: We built Migron, in order to destroy it.
Q: What do you mean ?
A: Where did all the Religious Zionists live before 1967, in Petach Tikva, maybe Bayit Ve-Gan ?
    How could we just go in and destroy all those buildings in Petach Tikva ?
    Not that destroying a few buildings wouldn't have been an improvement, if you've ever seen Petach Tikva.
    So we tricked them into moving to settlements so we could expel them and destroy their homes.
Q: Is it true that the homes built for the residents of Migron are not ready ?
A:  What homes ?  We brought in Steven Spielberg to build a Hollywood Set.  He did a nice job too, it looks really realistic on TV.
Q:  What about those Arabs who claim they own the land in Migron.  Why did they "chicken out" and not show up in court to prove their claim.
A:  Oh, those Arabs.  Those are just unemployed actors.  We got them from the same agency as the "crying Arab mother."

Q.  Do you feel it's appropriate in a democracy to send in 100 policemen to kick people out of their homes
A.  We had to do it to reassure the public ...  that the police are actually capable of doing something.


kol tuv,
Dan