White House
White HouseiStock

I haven’t really thought this through, to tell you the truth. Two states for two people. Right here in the United States.

Anyway, if I ever get around to writing another book…which I doubt…it would be on that, splitting the nation in half.

I will need help developing the scenario. There will be complications, but also, perhaps, a bestseller. So jump in.

No idea is too ridiculous in a country where everything has become ridiculous

The plan is simple enough…one half for me, the Red States…the other half for you…the Blue States.

Don’t we have something like this already? Yes. I think so. We only take it several steps further.

Title: “The Divided States of America.” Catchy, huh?

No civil war, silly. We did that already. Rather, the peaceful sharing of power…Biden and Trump share the White House.

Two presidents for two people.

Also, of course, two national anthems, which (in real life) the NFL has already approved for pro football.

We could learn about this from the savants who propose such a plan for Israel. Oops. Already a difficulty. We have 50 states to play with, and they only have one.

Besides, we don’t have Hamas, the PLO, the PA, Fatah, Hezbollah, Islamic Jihad, clamoring to wring our necks, nor Iran to wipe us off the map. The Israelis do. (Imagine these people implanted into the heart of Israel through a “two-state-solution.” What can possibly go wrong?)

Also, the Israelis are happy and grateful with that one country that they’ve got. Nothing like that can be said about us here in the United States, if you talk to a Democrat.

The Israelis are happy and grateful with that one country that they’ve got. Nothing like that can be said about us here in the United States, if you talk to a Democrat.

But let’s pretend, and away we go, briefly, from an Israeli perspective. Abbas gets his own state smack in the middle of Israel, his own government, recognized, each day, by the UN, featuring his own tanks, planes, missiles and festooned military…which means he laughed while signing the “demilitarized” part of the agreement.

He thought it was funny…a real knee-slapper. A real howler, too, disallowing 20 million “refugee return” cousins to join his fiefdom. They keep swarming in.

So in this state within a state, Netanyahu gets up to address his people, and speaks about Israel’s many achievements, with many more to come. Truly a light unto the nations.

Then it’s Abbas’s turn, and he tells his people that everything they were given is not enough, so to continue feeling miserable and to proceed with days of rage and destruction.

Those would be our Democrats…Made in the USA.

Stick with me here, because I’m seeing big money if we can get Kathy Griffin to play Nancy Pelosi.

But never mind the details. As we get the usual five minutes to pitch it to a New York publisher and Quentin Tarantino in Hollywood, we explain our vision, which shows America cut in half, 25 Red; 25 Blue, each with its own laws, rules and regulations. It begins with Biden serving as president of Blue America.

He lasts for three weeks and through mail-in ballots, Ilhan Omar steps up to replace him. She becomes President of the United States. Well, half. The Blue half.


Then you never imagined that a bartender, AOC, would, overnight, turn into the most powerful member of Congress. You thought only Austrian house painters transform so quickly?

In this Blue America, there are no books and no movies, and no newspapers or TV news channels other than those approved by Secretary of Culture, Rashida Tlaib. This leaves them with one newspaper, The New York Times, and one channel, CNN, which must be turned on and watched all the time. You get tested.

There are no police. Need help? Too bad…or call a hippy. Over there, humans are valueless, property is condemned, and it is shameful to be an American.

In Red State America, the police are supported and admired, life and property are precious, Trump is president, and it is great to be an American.

I could go on, but you get the picture. Trouble is, reading back what I wrote, it is like that already. We are saying nothing original. They’ll say we are being derivative. Ouch.

Plus, it is not working.

I still say we give it a shot. Okay? I’ll write the Treatment. So, we go straight to film. Nobody reads anyway. Like the Harvard-educated lady said, “Who is this Mozart?”

Likewise, who is this Shakespeare? Who is this Hemingway? Nobody knows. Nobody cares. So, a movie it is.

If not Tarantino, I know someone at HBO. No. Wait. I think he’s been fired. Yes, he’s DONE. Refused to bend. Declined to take a knee or something.

He was the last of a kind, a man who believed in free speech. Fearless. Old School. Now extinct. Like the rest of the country.

Meantime, UN envoy Nikolai Mladnov marched with the PA/Hamas and other terrorists to protest Israel’s plan to annex part of Judea and Samaria. Mladnov is listed as “envoy to the Middle East peace process.” Also, some 1,000 European leaders demand action against Israel should it exercise its rights as a sovereign nation. File this under – “If they all think it is so bad, it must be good.”

New York-based bestselling American novelist Jack Engelhard writes regularly for Arutz Sheva.

He wrote the worldwide book-to-movie bestseller “Indecent Proposal,” the authoritative newsroom epic, “The Bathsheba Deadline,” followed by his coming-of-age classics, “The Girls of Cincinnati,” and, the Holocaust-to-Montreal memoir, “Escape from Mount Moriah.” For that and his 1960s epic “The Days of the Bitter End,” contemporaries have hailed him “The last Hemingway, a writer without peer, and the conscience of us all.” Website: www.jackengelhard.com

Engelhard books
Engelhard booksJ.Engelhard