'I haven't come full circle yet'

Fiancee of murdered IDF soldier Hadar Goldin speaks about what Memorial Day means for her.

Hezki Baruch ,

Edna Sarusi
Edna Sarusi
Hezki Baruch, Arutz Sheva

Edna Sarusi, who was engaged to kidnapped and murdered IDF soldier Hadar Goldin, spoke to Arutz Sheva on Friday.

Goldin was kidnapped and killed during 2014's Operation Protective Edge. Hamas still holds his body, refusing to release it for burial.

On Sunday night and Monday, Israel will mark the Memorial Day for the Fallen Soldiers of Israel and Victims of Terrorism.

Sarusi, who met Arutz Sheva at the Tzfira religious girls' high school as part of the high school's Memorial Day project, spoke about her personal "memorial day."

"This is the third year already," Sarusi said. "It's the third year in which Memorial Day has a different meaning for me. I think Memorial Day doesn't mean as much for the families of the fallen, because we experience it, and live with it, every day."

"On Memorial day, it gets more of a focus. The people around you notice more.

"Suddenly, I'm on the other side of the divide.

"I haven't come full circle yet, it's still half open. I haven't really made peace with it. It's become very difficult - but it's always difficult, not just on Memorial Day."

Regarding Goldin's mother's fight to bring his body back to Israel, Sarusi said, "I really identify with her. It's very embarrassing to see how our leadership thinks, acts, and works."

"The high school called me up, and I was very moved that they wanted to take it a step further, instead of holding a regular Memorial Day ceremony.

"They're really trying to show the depth of every soldier we lost, and who Hadar really was. They're doing hard work, and really trying to show what a special person Hadar was. I want to thank the school, and their student Hallel Meir, for doing this project.

"It's not hard to talk about him. It's hard to figure out how to explain an entire person in a few sentences. It's hard to show how great a person he was, to people who never knew him."

Hallel Meir, a student at Tzfira, told Arutz Sheva why Goldin was chosen.

"We were given a literature project, and we had to research soldiers who fell in Israel's wars," Meir said. "I immediately thought of Hadar Goldin."

"My father teaches in Hadar's school, and my family reads everything that's published about Hadar. I learned a lot about him during my project. The fact that Hadar always knew that he would go wherever Israel needed him to go, made a strong impression on me."

Sarusi ended the interview with her own message.

"Be good people, and don't give up on yourselves. Always smile, and always try to do good," she concluded.