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      Uprooting for Israel

      Supporters of the disengagement are being provided a chance to show their solidarity with Israel in accordance with a new DJNF campaign, it was announced this week.
      First Publish: 3/24/2005, 1:04 PM / Last Update: 3/24/2005, 2:41 PM

      "For decades," states the promotional literature, "planting trees in Israel was the way you showed your support. Now, for the nominal fee of only $18.00 (plus $4.95 postage and handling), our dedicated staff of volunteers will personally uproot a growing tree in either Gaza or the West Bank."

      Supporters are thus offered a chance to take an active part in the Sharon government’s plan to rip out a flourishing, growing part of the Jewish homeland. "What better way to show the Palestinians that their years of terror were not in vain?" asks the DJNF.

      The DJNF offers supporters a chance to "commemorate that special event in your life or in the life of a loved one! After the tree has been pulled out by the roots, an appropriate plaque will be placed next to the gapping hole. Here is a real chance to show your support by having your name, or the name of a loved one, placed near a tree you helped destroy. You will also receive a certificate suitable for framing to prove to the world just how much you care about the land of Israel. (For a nominal additional fee of $10.00, we will even uproot a tree that was planted in the year of your bar/bat mitzvah.)"

      The DJNF offer also includes a warning: "Don’t be fooled by imitators! There are some organizations that will put your plaque on one of the thousands of holes made by Palestinian-fired Kassam missiles! Only a certificate bearing the DJNF logo will guarantee that a live tree has been ripped from the ground. So send in your donation now before the all the good trees are gone."

      All proceeds go towards the Keep the Sharon Family Out of Jail Legal Defense Fund.

      In addition, it must be noted that the above is a Purim story, submitted by A.H., who says he prefers to remain anonymous "until all my daughters are married off."