The Ask the Rabbi section of the Bet El Yeshiva site has become the main venue for secular Israelis to reach out for rabbinical guidance, in a comfortable anonymous fashion. The letters are sometimes astounding, and it is heartwarming to see a quiet revolution taking place, of Israelis seeking to return to the spiritual roots of the Jewish nation.
I am interested in starting to keep the Laws of Nidah. Can you give me a general explanation of how to count the days [that my husband and I are forbidden to have relations] and when I should go to the mikva (ritual bath)?
Shalom Dear N,
I got your letter was overjoyed to see your desire to observe one of the beautiful gifts that Hashem gave us. We are accustomed to calling these laws the Laws of Family Purity, because they infuse the whole family with purity, and raise the level of the husband-wife relationship, and open us up to becoming holier.
These laws, which are complex and very personal, are usually studied in person, in a one-on-one encounter with a bridal counselor. A bridal counselor is a woman who underwent special training, and learned the laws in depth to a level where she is able to teach others how to observe the laws according to Torah in the best way.
Therefore, if you would like, I can refer you to a bridal counselor in your area, with whom you can learn the subject in a relaxed, serene manner, until you feel comfortable with the laws, so that they are in no way a burden upon you, but rather elevate you and make you feel wonderful.
In the meantime, you can start reading about the laws of family purity at this site: http://www.neveh.org/morgan/nidah/default.html [Hebrew site given in original letter: http://www.taharat.com/teharat/dinim.asp ]
I am happy to stay in touch and be of assistance in any way I can. Regarding the topic of family purity, or any other topic, I am here at your service, so feel free to contact me, to ask questions, clarify issues, or seek advice.
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