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Komokarzy the First visits Israeli Knesicircus

By David Wilder
6/23/2008, 12:00 AM
Komokarzy the First today blasted his way into the Israeli Knesicircus, taking center ring. It wasn't clear to the viewers if the visitor was appearing as a clown or a suicide bomber, and they had trouble deciding whether to laugh or cry.

Actually Komokarzy confided to the Prime Monster of the Knesicircus that he planned on requesting asylum during the show, due to the fact that some 5 million Islamic fanatics had overrun his country, and were now over 8% of the population. However the Prime Monster replied that the all the Israeli asylums were packed full of ex-politicians being tested for insanity pleas and there was no room for foreigners.

That was when Komokarzy the first decided to join the ranks of his fast-breeding newcomers to his country, and convert on the spot. Sticking out his tongue at the two Israeli Chief Rabbis and then opening his arms and bowing in the direction of his new found friends in the stinking bullpen, Kamokarzy smiled a wicked smile and proclaimed:

I will always be your friend. (One of the viewers in the Knesicircus whisperdly exclaimed: "Look, there in the mirror - you can see his other side - he has his fingers crossed!!!" He, he, he --- he doesn't mean it!! He's lying!! How can this be - the great Komokarzy the First is lying to us, in our own home, on our own turf, in the Knesicircus!!!"

Then, smiling only at the stinking bullpen, but frowning sternly at the others, he continued: For the sake of piece you must expel at least 300,000 Jews from their homes, and relocate them. NOW!
One of the Knescircus pawnamentarians piped up from the gallery, let's have a party transfer, ah, ah, no, that's transfer party, ah - as long as your country is becoming Muslim, you take our Arabs and you give us your Jews - and you'll be remembered ever after as the great piece maker - you'll even get the Nepal Prize - here, we can award you one now."

Komokarzy whipped out a smelly French kiss that had belonged to his wife and tossed it at the speaker who promptly shriveled up and melted from the odor.

After that, everyone kept their mouths shut.

The Komokarzy continued: you will build an Ark, load them up, and put them out to sea. There is no room for them here, but the ocean is very very large.

You will then imitate the way it was in the beginning of your peoplehood. I am going to reward you for your hard labor so many years ago. Then you were forced to build – today you will take vacation; no one will build. All building will stop, as of now

Then the water parted. Today it will not be the sea, rather the city will be divided. Almost as written in the Bible, with only slight variations. My word is as good as His.

Now you will vote on my piece plan: Mr. Prime Monster, how do you say?

“Yeah Yeah,” he replied. Yeah, yeah all the pawnamentarians yelled.

Komokarzy the First then looked towards his new found friends, sitting in the stinking bullpen, and waved with a victory salute.

To his great shock, he saw them ignite a small rocket, with the words Komokarzy the Second engraved on the side. The fired it in his direction and seconds later he was gone, a puff in the wind.

As his spirit drifted aimlessly above them, as if lost in space, he cried down to them: why, why?

Ignoring him, the bullpen players huddled to plan their next play, saying: a Komokarzy thought he’d get out of here alive? Guess we showed him a thing or two. Who’s next?