Mind Blogging

When I told my wife that I had been invited to write a blog for INN, she asked me what a blog was. So I did some research into the etymology of the word.

Apparently, the word was coined by Shmuel Bloggerman, who shortened his name to Shmuel Blog, so that people wouldn’t know he was Jewish.

In the world of medicine, blog is a common word. In hospitals, you will often hear doctors say, “What is the patient’s blog count?” or “His blood is blogging.”

Sinks, drain pipes, and toilets can also get blogged.

Other uses of the word are: “The traffic is blogged.” “The runway is blogged.” “My head is blogged.”

Grandmothers often say, “My bowels are blogged.”

Teenagers are fond of saying, “absolutely mind blogging!”


Apparently, the word was coined by Shmuel Bloggerman, who shortened his name to Shmuel Blog, so that people wouldn’t know he was Jewish
Some say that blog was originally supposed to be glob, as in “A glob of vomit,” but that a typing error changed Internet history.

Marine biologists maintain that fish were the first creatures to use the expression. Underwater recordings of fish reveal that they are always saying, “blog, blog, blog.”

In slang, the word is used as a curse, as in, “Get blogged!” or “Go blog yourself!”

Englishmen say, “This is a blogging good cup of tea.”

The philosopher, Descartes, said, “I blog, therefore I am.”

Ringo Starr said, “You are what you blog.”

Blog is actually an acronym in Hebrew for “Bagels, Lox, and Gefilta Fish.” Others say, “Bitul Lemud Gadol,” meaning a big neglect of Torah learning.

One of the most important principles of Judaism is to serve the L-rd with Simcha, which means joy. Rabbi Nachman taught that it is a mitzvah to always be happy!

So happy blogging!

Blog of Blogs

To my Jewish brothers and sisters the world over, and to all friends of the Jewish People and Israel, I bid you shalom.

It is with great embarrassment and trepidation that I have agreed to inaugurate this blog. Who am I to express my yearnings, thoughts, views, and prayers over such an international public forum? Then again, after four thousand years of reincarnations in previous lifetimes, and during my voyage from Hollywood to the Holy Land in this life, I have hopefully gleaned some precious bits of knowledge that I can share.

Nonetheless, I will try to lower my voice to a whisper and let other more holy and knowledgeable voices do the writing. Thus we will hear the musings of Rabbi Avraham Yitzhak HaCohen Kook, the opinions of Rabbi Meir Kahane, the esoteric wisdom of Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai and the holy Zohar. We will study some Kabbalah, Jewish Law, and translate important writings of Torah giants throughout the ages. We will speak about happiness in marriage, a lot about kosher sex, and bringing up the kids. We will hear about people’s problems, and learn how the saintly Kabbalist, Rabbi Eliahu Leon Levi, helped them adopt a healthier, happier path.

When we write about politics, we will try to see G-d’s ever-present Hand in the modern unfolding of Jewish history and search to find deeper, more spiritual solutions to our national ills. Hopefully, we will laugh together, and pray together, and exchange ideas. Sometimes I will probably bore you, and other times I will write things that peeve you off. Whatever we write, we will endeavor to do so in the letter and spirit of Jewish Law, even when speaking about the corrupt and empty-headed politicians who often mess up our lives. Our main goal will always be to strive to get closer to Torah, to the Land of Israel, and to G-d.

That is the reason we are on this planet.

Everything else is “vanity of vanities,” like surfing on the Internet, the virtual cyberspace hooker of our times. So here we go. Hold on to your seats. This is the blog of blogs, the voice of holiness, Torah, and truth, preparing for blast off. Get ready for a magical mystery tour of the universe. May the L-rd be with us, and may all that we do find favor in His eyes.