Freak Election Day Blizzard UPDATE See TB#35

That’s what I’m predicting. Because starting tonight, I am going to start praying for a Tuesday snowstorm. Not just an ordinary snowstorm, but an all-day blizzard, with rain and sleet and hail. And 100 mile-an-hour winds. Let G-d throw in some leftover Egyptian locusts, and lice, and boils, and giant hailstones to keep apathetic voters at home. That way only the most dedicated, most Zionist diehards will come out and cast their ballots. And who are they? The lovers of Eretz Yisrael. The settlers. The hilltop youth. The orange army, and everyone who still has enough sense to want to save the country from the chopper’s block of Kedima, Lieberman, and the Likud. If everyone prays for a voting-day blizzard, then the next Israeli government will be run by religious Jews with “Ketzaleh” at its head.

Freak Snowstorm Keeps Voters at Home

Fantasy? Wishful thinking? No way. Anyone who has been following the last few Torah readings about the Exodus knows that it can happen. Join me in praying for even a torrential downpour and the religious will sweep the elections. The secular won’t want to get wet. Instead, they’ll spend their day off watching TV and getting stoned. Only the Jews who really care about the Land of Israel and the Torah will brave the stormy weather, and that’s, first and foremost, the supporters of the “Echud HaLeumi.”

After I vote for them in the morning, I will be spending the day driving elderly voters to the polling stations in my car, so they can also vote for Ketzaleh and the “Echud HaLeumi.” I have already put on my snow tires and got new windshield wipers. But I need your help, so start praying now.

I don’t know about snow, but if it doesn’t rain cats and dogs on Tuesday, then, blee nader, I quit this blog. You hear that up in heaven? If it doesn’t rain on Tuesday, then I quit this blog! Is that what you want – to give the lovers of galut the satisfaction of being finished with Fishman? Who will yell at them? Who will expose their charade?

Let’s face it. It’s a simple question of numbers. If the religious Jews in the Diaspora would come to live in Israel, the government in Israel would be religious. The Prime Minister would be religious. It’s as simple as can be. The lovers of the exile can find fault with a million things in Israel, but they are the ones to blame.

Why Diaspora Jews Love the Exile

By being alienated from the recognition of the secrets of Torah, the holiness of Eretz Yisrael is understood in a foggy, unfocused fashion.

By alienating oneself from the secrets of G-d, the highest treasures of the deep Divine life become extraneous, secondary matters which do not enter the depths of the soul, and as a result, the most potent force of the individual's and of the nation's soul will be missing; and the exile is found to be pleasant in its own accord.

For to someone who only understands the superficial level, nothing basic will be lacking in the absence of the Land of Israel, the Jewish Kingdom, and all of the facets of the nation in its built form. For him, the foundation of the yearning for Salvation is like a side branch that cannot be united with the deep understanding of Judaism, and this itself testifies to the poverty of insight which is found in this juiceless perspective.

We are not rejecting any form or contemplation which is founded on truthfulness, on sensitivity of thought, or on the fear of Heaven, in whatever form it takes; but rejecting only the specific aspect of this perspective which seeks to negate the secrets of Torah and their great influence on the spirit of the nation – for this is a tragedy which we are obligated to fight against with counsel and wisdom, with holiness and with valor.

By Rabbi Avraham Yitzchak HaKohen Kook, from his book, “Orot,” 1:2. To read a commentary on this essay, click here.

Diaspora Jews Tell Moses to Get Lost

Imagine if Moses were to come to America today with the mission of bringing the Jews to Israel. Chances are that his call would be met by deaf ears. Let’s face it - outside of a few weirdoes, who would listen? It would be interfering with their plans, their schooling, their careers, their businesses, their golf games and tennis lessons.

Some would question his authority. Others would doubt that G-d had really sent him. Liberal and Reconstructionist Jews would answer, like Pharoah, “Who’s Hashem that I should listen to him?” Others would laugh at Moses’s Biblical garments and staff. Probably most of them would tell him to get lost.  

“Aliyah is suicide,” some would tell him, like the Spies and followers of Korach of old.

Not that it would ruffle Moses. After all, he had witnessed the very same scenario before, when he came to take the Jews out of Egypt. Back then, only a fifth of the Jews agreed to follow him to the Land of Israel. Four-fifths of the Egypt-loving Jews died in the plague of darkness.  

Land of Darkness

The Torah describes it as darkness that could be felt (Shemot, 10:21). The darkness was so thick, you could literally reach out your hand and feel it. Rashi says that Hashem brought the plague of darkness upon Egypt “because there were Jews in that generation who were wicked and they did not want to come out of Egypt, and they died in the three days of darkness, in order that the Egyptians should not see their fall and say, ‘They too are smitten as we are’” (Shemot, 10: 22). To avoid the great embarrassment that His people, the Children of Israel,  did not want to go home to the Land of Israel, G-d brought a thick, tangible darkness over Egypt so that the goyim wouldn’t see this terrible disgrace.

Unfortunately this same dense darkness has enveloped Diaspora Jews today. It is a darkness so thick, you can actual feel it. Olim, Jews who have made aliyah, and who go back to America or France or England to visit relatives, know what I mean. After speaking with fellow Jews there for a few minutes, you get the creepy feeling that they are totally out of touch with reality. They think they know what’s going on, but they don’t know what’s going on at all. You can talk about aliyah until you are blue in the face and they don’t understand a thing. Their darkness is so dense, they can’t grasp what you are saying. What is really important to the Jewish People, they don’t think is important at all. And what’s not important at all, like the new President, or the new Clint Eastwood movie, or their new car, they talk about like it was the only thing that mattered.

Whenever I have to go there, I get the feeling that I am in a gigantic Alzheimer’s ward, where the patients have forgotten who they are.

The Cuckoo's Nest

I’m not talking about devoted INN addicts, who click on every day to see what’s happening “b’Aretz.”  I am talking about your average assimilated, Haredi, or Modern Orthodox Jew. They’ve forgotten Jerusalem. Washington D.C. is their capital. America is their homeland. Judaism is their religion, not their nationality. They are Americans first. The proof is that hearing the “Star Spangled Banner” at baseball games gives them goose bumps. Their children pledge allegiance to the American flag. Their forefathers are Betsy Ross and George Washington. If Moses himself came and tried to persuade them that the Land of Israel was their home, and not America, or Australia, or Mexico, they’d look at him like he was nuts.

That’s the meaning of darkness that you can feel.

I am not blaming them. The darkness of materialism is so great, who can fight against it? And there is nobody there to teach them about true Judaism and the centrality of Eretz Yisrael. At best, Jewish life there revolves around the annual Federation dinner, or the shul, not around rebuilding our nation in Israel. Instead of working to bring an end to the exile, they endeavor to lengthen it by strengthening their communities there. That’s darkness “mamash.”