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Adar 13, 5769, 3/9/2009
Ask The Rebbe
I'm flattered. A bit unnereved. The responsibility awes me. But I'll do my best to answer your questions with the deep and sometimes hidden wisdom suitable to Purim, when the Jewish People accepted the Oral Torah once again. If there is a delay in my response, it's because I've run out to the local grocery to buy some more beer. May it be the will of the Master of Disguises that I not err in the rendering of halachah, nor lead any person astray. Tzvi during his Hollywood Years
Purim Quiz: Who is this praying? Moses Brown, President Obama, Al Jolson?
Blog Photo of the Year: The Hazan Moki Hirotitoman in the Great Synagogue of Kyoto, Japan
How to put on prophylacteries
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Adar 12, 5769, 3/8/2009
EXCLUSIVE!! Photos of Vienna Mike
I recently received this letter and accompanying photos from an anonymous sender who insists that he has discovered the identity of “Mike from Vienna, Virginia.” I have edited out real names and places to avoid legal hassles. Dear Mr. Fishman: You don’t know me, and I don’t know you, except through your blog which I have now just discovered in the following way. Saturday night, I was having a drink in one of our local bars here in @@@@ when one of the fellas got a bit rowdy. He was throwing darts into a dartboard with deadly accuracy, and cursing with each throw, “I hate him! I hate him!” he kept repeating. “Who do you hate?” I asked him. “Fishy,” he said. Finishing off a bottle of beer, he set it down next to another four empties on the table and hurled another dart straight into the bulls-eye. “Who’s Fishy?” I asked. “Fishface,” he replied. Out of darts, he sat drunkenly down at the table. Suddenly, he burst out crying. “I hate his Israeli guts.” he said. “He humiliates me with every blog he writes. He makes me sound like a jerk. Because of him, the whole world thinks I’m a coward.” “What blog is that?” I inquired. “Israel National News, you peon!” he answered, shouting for another beer. “I’m going to kill him. You’ll see. I don’t lack the means. I didn’t spend half my life in the army for nothing. If I could kill a couple dozen Taliban in Afghanistan, and two dozen A-rabs in Iraq, I can surely knock off one lemming of an Israeli Jew.” “To hell with them all!” he continued, gulping down half of his new beer. “To hell with the world. They didn’t want to read my website, so to hell with them all. Let them all nuke each other off the friggin map. Old Vienna Mike will have the last laugh. He’ll outlive them all.” “How are you going to do that?” I asked him. “On Vienna’s Mike’s Survival Ark, that’s how. What do you think about that?” “You must be a real genius,” I said to him, to get on his good side. “I’d sure like to see it, if it really exists.” So we made an appointment to meet the next day. Here are the pictures. He’s got enough food to survive for a year in his galley, along with all kinds of gas masks, water purifiers, Geiger counters, chemical suits, oxygen tanks, helmets, radiation antigens, and weapons. Vienna Mike and his Survival Ark
"I built it all by myself."
So, Mr. Fishman, if you are the Fishy that he was talking about, please beware.
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Adar 10, 5769, 3/6/2009
Amalek Today
On Shabbat Zachor, every man and women of Israel is required to hear the Torah portion, “Remember what Amalek did to you….” Elsewhere, we have described how Amalek’s plan was to weaken and strike at the Jewish People by drawing them into sexual sin. The holy Sage and Kabbalist, Rabbi Tzaddok HaKohen of Lublin, explains that we read the portion of remembering Amalek before Purim in order to remind ourselves that our strength over our enemies depends on the holiness of our sexual lives. When this sanctity rises, then the impurity of Amalek falls, paving the way for its destruction on Purim ("Yisrael Kiddoshim," 8:27). Today, the spirit of Amalek in the world is still trying to uproot the holiness of Israel by exporting all of its immoral culture, homosexuality, and pornography to the Holy Land. Throughout the Diaspora, the spirit of Amalek is working overtime to lure the Jews into sexual transgression via assimilation. Like their ancestors before them, these modern day sons of and daughters of Amalek are hoping that this spiritual pollution will sever our connection with the Almighty, leaving us vulnerable to their ever-evil designs of destroying our holy nation, may the Almighty foil their plans. This is what we have to remember, and guard against, and fight with education and counseling, in order to repel this plague of spiritual pollution from our borders, from our streets, and from our homes, television screens, and computers. We blot out the memory of Amalek by physically annihilating the likes of Hamas, Iran, Syria, Hizballah, Fatach, and the other sworn enemies of Israel, and by sanctifying our lives according to the dictates of the Torah. In so doing, the L-rd G-d of Israel shall be One, and His Name shall be One over all of the earth.
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Hollywood to the Holy Land
by Tzvi Fishman
Tzvi Fishman was awarded the Israel Ministry of Education Prize for Jewish Creativity and Culture
Before making Aliyah to Israel in 1984, Tzvi Fishman was a successful Hollywood screenwriter. He has co-authored 4 books with Rabbi David Samson, based on the teachings of Rabbis A. Y. Kook and T. Y. Kook.
His other books include: The Kuzari For Young Readers and Tuvia in the Promised Land. His most recent book, Secret of the Brit, can be found at JewishSexuality.com, along with an abbreviated online version. |
