And yet, I know the weapon, the true weapon, Israel will use if and when it attacks Iran's nuclear infrastructure. Some will dismiss this as whimsical. If you are of that type, you can stop reading right here because you are probably right and oh, so wrong. Some will say that God Himself will avenge, in advance, anyone who would dare to attack His people. Sadly, we know that is not true. Even today, there remain survivors who can tell you of a time when God allowed His people to suffer. If you are expecting me to say that God will handle Iran, here too you may want to stop.

So let me tell anyone who has continued past the previous comments what I believe, what I know, about what will happen. I believe that if the world will not stop Iran - and I believe with all its talk, it won't - then yes, Israel will attack Iran and, if it does, it will, most definitely, use a secret weapon. It isn't so much secret as one that is denied. We've used it in the past, in the distant past and in the recent past.

There was a meeting once at West Point in which an American general spoke to new cadets. I have heard his name, but can't remember it - so perhaps someone can help me with  more of the details of the speech he gave. What I remember from the story was that the general cited many different battles in history as examples of great historical military strategies. One cadet raised his hand and asked why the general did not include any of Israel's battles. The general refused to answer, telling the cadet to see him after the speech. When the cadet approached the general quietly at the end and asked his question again, the general explained that he could not use Israel's military strategy because they were, from a military point of view, impossible. He told the cadet that what Israel had accomplished was physically, historically, militarily impossible. No, he didn't deny that Israel had done it - only that, essentially, without God (and I would add our secret weapon), we could never have done what we did. That cadet chose to leave West Point. He came to live in Israel and joined the army here.

As for our secret weapon - it is a combination of two great forces - determination and desperation. That simple - and that impossible to duplicate. In 1948, a nation of vastly outnumbered, under-armed, badly trained, and with the added weight of tens of thousands of half-starved, empty-handed refugees from hell - defeated five standing armies. In battles to great to count, victory by the weak was delivered - by God and by  the knowledge that there was no other place, no other land. The Arab threat to push the Jews into the sea was both dramatic and accurate - that was the only real place they had left.

On Yom Kippur (October 6, 1973), when Israelis were in the synagogues praying, Egypt and Syria launched a war against them. About 1,400 Syrian tanks faced off against 170 Israeli tanks. Within three days, scores of Syrian tanks had been destroyed, at the cost of almost 3/4 of the Israeli tanks. By October 9th, the third day of the war, Israel was down to just 6 tanks. In a valley that has since been called the Valley of Tears, a young Israeli named Avigdor Kahalani was facing impossible odds. He had only a handful of tanks and defeat was certain. Kahalani called his situation in, and was ordered to withdraw. He wanted help - that's why he called, and he was told to retreat.

Kahalani refused - he complained to command that he couldn't hear them and that he was going on. In a battle that could only be described as half mad, he ordered his tanks to spread out and fire wildly in all directions. The Syrians believed that reinforcements had arrived and fell back. Determination and desperation. Kahalani knew that if the Syrians came down off the Golan Heights, all of Israel lay before them.

Will Israel attack Iran? When will it happen? Will it happen? I could enter the pool of guessing games; I could tell you what I believe, which has no basis in reality. But rather, I'll say something else.

We did not come to this land to be taken from it. I do not believe God will ever allow us to be exiled again. Elie is organizing his passport to travel with his future wife to visit her family. His passports are all expired - all of ours are expired. People keep saying we should get them renewed and I know they are right and yet I hesitate. I will not leave this land. The Iranians will not succeed, nor will the Syrians or the Palestinians.

Our secret weapon is that we have no where else to go, no other land that is ours. There are more than 20 other Arab countries; there is only one Jewish one. We would like to live in peace with our neighbors and as soon as they agree, we might actually have a shot at it someday.

In the meantime, Israel may have to attack Iran's nuclear infrastructure because we may not have a choice. If we do, I believe with complete faith, that we go with God as our Pilot. We will succeed - because we are determined, because we are desperate, because ultimately, our secret weapon is that we don't have 19 other lands from which to choose from...only Israel, always Israel.

In the Cast Lead War in which my son fought, there were many who said Israel was wrong. When we tried to point out that Cast Lead was preceded by the massive bombing of our cities by rockets and mortars, the word "disproportionality" was used. What does this mean?

It's simple, was the response. Sure, Israel was getting bombarded - but most of the rockets miss, don't they? Well, yes, with the help of God and through no intention of the bomber, yeah, they miss most of the time and hit empty fields. Of course, when they do hit, they kill and maim and destroy - people and massive amounts of property and even when they miss, they cause terror and shock, trauma and psychological pain.

But yes, when Israel fires - most times, we hit our target. Of course, they didn't like our target and they didn't like us hitting it so they moved their rockets into schools, mosques and hospitals so they could say we were destroying civilian buildings. It was, they claimed, all about disproportionality.

Of course, that word only works when the Palestinians want to use it. We aren't allowed to use it because...because...well, just because. So tomorrow, we will release 1,027 prisoners - among them the murderers of almost 600 Israelis. Those that have murdered children, babies, mothers and fathers. They have left a trail of orphans, widows, and parents who will never recover from the agonies of losing their sons and daughters.

We will do this for the return of one son - Gilad Shalit.

Disproportionality? 1 for 1,027? Apparently so - by sheer math, this means that each of these prisoners is worth 1/1027th of the life of a Jew, of an Israeli. But this is not a politically correct statement in a world that wants to believe in the equality of man...expect, of course, when it comes to Israel and the Palestinians.

Our high court has pushed aside all last minute petitions against the trade. From our side, we are clear. Whether it will happen or not, now depends solely on the honor of the Palestinians - a frightening concept. So let's say it depends more on the pragmatism of Hamas. Tomorrow, they will declare themselves the victors - it's what they do no matter what happens.

But that's really okay with me. I'm fine with living in a land that would trade 1,027 terrorists and murderers to get back one Jewish soul. Am I afraid of future deals and more kidnappings and attacks - of course I am. But for tomorrow, I'm going to put that all aside and thank God I live in Israel, where we would let loose these killers to save Gilad. I thank God I don't live in a society that will take to the streets tomorrow to celebrate the return of killers, that my country will be cleansed of the filth that is Ahlam Tamimi and the like.

No, not all - but most of the 1,027th of them will go to Gaza, Syria, Turkey, Qatar and I'm going to believe that the air I breathe will be that much cleaner, disproportionally cleaner than it is right now.

And I'm going to do one more thing - I'm going to believe, with complete faith, that what man fails to do, God will. God will avenge the blood of the 600; God will remember their sacrifice and the pain of their families and curse these miserable 1,027 people - all the days of their lives.

No, I would not want to be Palestinian tomorrow, a society that will be judged for its heroes and will be found lacking. Celebrate tomorrow, Gaza but know that we celebrate too. We celebrate the return of Gilad Shalit and we celebrate that we are not you, not a society who worships killers and death.

And in the next war - because we all know there will be one - perhaps you'll have to come up with a different word because disproportionality just won't work after you demanded and received 1,027 for 1.

Hakim Awad is an 18-year-old Palestinian from the small village of Awarta. On the night of March 11, 2011, Hakim and his cousin Amjad entered the small Jewish village of Itamar. Their movements that night are known, their actions an atrocity beyond imagination. They entered the Fogel home and in a short time, murdered Udi and Ruthi Fogel, parents to 6 children - the oldest only 12 years old. 

Ruthi was a gentle mother of six. Never a soldier. Unarmed. Her murder was as barbaric and wrong as her husband's and yet, somehow, given what is to come, still not shocking. We have lost precious Jewish mothers before. As mothers, we stand in front of our children to defend them. This is what Ruthi did. Somehow, with her body, she blocked the door of her two young sons and so the terrorists did not enter that room. They and their oldest sister Tamar, who was not home, were the only ones to live.

Hakim and Amjad murdered precious little Elad, who was only 4 years old. They stabbed him in the heart. The shock becomes a chocking grief as it sinks in.

And Hakim and Amjad murdered tiny, little Hadas, who was only 3 months old. They slit her throat and left her body beside that of her murdered father. This is where the grief becomes a pain so deep the heart breaks. You wonder at the barbarity and you question how this thing that murdered these precious souls has a right to breathe the same air we do. The anger bubbles up and chokes you.

And then you read in Maan Agency News (Palestinian "news" source) that maybe it was a Thai worker who did it; that there was no evidence it was Palestinians. But that, of course, was always a lie. There was direct evidence. The stupid Hakim and Amjad all but left a trail of bloody footprints back to Awarta.

Israel is, I remind myself often, a democracy. It arrested the cousins, when I would have wanted them beaten, hanged, sliced open as they did to little Hadas. It is their bodies I want strewn on the floor in unbearable agony, not the Fogel family. But Israel is a just society. The cousins were arrested, and tried.

In a most just sentence, 18-year-old Hakim was found guilty - not hard to do since he's actually quite proud of his greatest achievement in his miserable, worthless life. He expresses no remorse. Actually, that isn't true. He regrets not killing Ruthi's other two sons. The courts imposed an interesting sentence - five consecutive life sentences. Not concurrent - but consecutive...plus another five years. 

By all that is just in the world, Hakim will spend the rest of his miserable life in jail. May it be a most horrible sentence - no, Israel, no - do not allow him regular family visits as you do others. Legally, we must let the Red Cross see him - fine - let them see him from behind an impenetrable glass. No, Israel - no higher education; there is no use educating something that cannot even really be called human. 

And before the anger chokes me further - let me say that we should release Hakim Awad. Now, Bibi - make the deal with Hamas. We will release one prisoner - a son for a son. Take your murderer, Hakim - you are welcome to him, and give us Gilad.

Gilad is pure. He was captured when he was 19 years old; Hakim is probably 19 now, or will be shortly. Pure he may never have been; and pure he never will be. What sentence he serves in this life is nothing for what awaits him in the next. I believe that even God was shocked and sickened by what Hakim did and I have complete faith that in His Infinite Wisdom, Hakim's eternal punishment will be so just and deserved.

Gilad served his nation. Hakim apparently served his. Gilad murdered no one, harmed no one. Hakim massacred an innocent family, a father, a mother, two young boys, and baby Hadas.

There, Hamas - take your murderer and give us Gilad. No, it is not justice, but it is a trade that is worthy because it is not 1,000 for one. And let it be known - if an Israeli soldier so much as sees Hakim Awad - even through the scope of his high-powered gun, Hakim is a dead man. 

Take Hakim into Gaza and let him live there - deep within. If we see him, this time, justice will be served with a bullet to his head or if the soldier manages to find it, Hakim's tiny and useless heart.

Gilad for Hakim - a trade the Palestinians can be proud of. We get our precious son, who stands for all we hold dear. Gilad could have avoided combat duty and been given a lower profile. He chose to fight with the army and demand a high enough profile to get him into the tank division. Gilad served his country with pride and honor. And Hakim, precious son of the Palestinians butchered an innocent baby. He too stands for much of what his people honor. 

A trade, then. Hakim for Gilad. Release Hakim Awad - release Gilad Shalit - and let us all move on to the agony and reality we live in. No, our stomachs and hearts and minds will not settle from this horror - not ever. If Hakim is to serve out his term in an Israeli prison, let it be the hell he deserves in this life. No cellular phone, no computer, no education earned while serving. The letter of international law and no more. Gilad has not been seen by the Red Cross in five years. 

Gilad is likely held deep underground, in the dark so that we cannot find him. Let Hakim be held in darkness, in silence. His crime has earned him no less (and a lot more). Or trade them. Give them back their son for ours. 

I cannot accept a trade that would see 1,000 freed for Gilad because in the Arab mind, this is a victory and next time they will demand 5,000. But a one-for-one trade I can stomach - on the condition that every Israeli soldier is given a picture of Hakim and orders to shoot him on sight.

Forgive me for this post...but I just can't ignore something that was reported in the news today. This isn't about Elie...who was named after one of my husband's uncles - his mother's brother, who was murdered by the Nazis shortly after his wedding. This isn't about Shmulik, who carries the name of another uncle, who collapsed in the forests of Europe and died. But it touches me...something that happened today...and so, I write.

A memorial to Holocaust victims was desecrated in Poland today. I saw the picture and recognized the monument immediately. It was in the tiny town of Jedwabne. Population approximately 3,100 in August, 1941 when the Polish villagers collected their 1,500 Jewish neighbors and murdered them all in a single, bloody attack. One Jewish family had been warned and fled; 2 other young men were able to escape to bear testimony to what their neighbors did. One was a 15-year-old boy. Fifteen, like my Davidi. The boy's father didn't remember, when the neighbors came and forced them from their home, if he'd locked the house. Go back, he told the boy. Go check and then catch up to us. He ran back to the house and then, as he returned, he began to wonder why. Instead of joining the slow moving line of Jews, the boy stayed hidden and watched. Watched as they locked the Jews in a barn...and set it afire. Their neighbors, 1,500 Jews.

After the war, the Poles erected a monument that said, "In memory of the 1,500 Poles murdered by the Hitlerites." No, the Germans had not yet arrived on that miserable day in August, 1941. The Jews, were murdered by the Poles because they were Jews. But the Poles couldn't keep the secret forever. There were those who knew the truth and remembered the hatred.

Finally, after decades of work, the Polish President came to Jedwabne to correct the wrong. The sign, the lie, was erased. They were Jews who were murdered in Jedwabne and they would be remembered as Jews. Finally. And so the memorial was replaced with new words. "In memory of the 1500 Jews who were murdered." But the lie continues, doesn't it? They admit the "Hitlerites" didn't do it...but don't admit they did - at least not on the memorial that stands in Jedwabne.

On a tour of Poland with my oldest daughter in 2004, they took us to Jedwabne as part of an 8-day tour. It is impossible to visit concentration camp after concentration camp, cemetery after cemetery, without breaking down. Why? I demanded. Why do you let them get away with this? The guide answered that were they to put, "To the 1,500 Jews murdered by their neighbors" it would be desecrated. Well, today, it was desecrated anyway.

One of the guides listened and then added that he had been in the town in 2001 when the new monument was unveiled. From the row of houses, he said pointing into the distance, someone put a stereo in the window and began blasting music to disrupt the ceremony. The president of Poland had come, even the Chief of Police of the land - to take part in the ceremony. The Chief of Police sent someone to make them close the stereo. Finally it was quiet and they were ready to begin.

And then, from the other side of town, "the Church bells started ringing, and ringing, and ringing. They had to send someone else to stop them," he explained. I once wrote, "Everyone has a breaking point. It is the point at which you simply feel you cannot take anymore. You cannot cry more, you cannot feel anger and you don't want to feel sadness. You feel that your heart hurts, and you don't want to feel that either." I broke in two places during my visit to Poland. One was in Jedwabne.

I broke at the thought that the hatred of World War II had survived the war and still lived on. I broke at the thought of a half a town rising up to murder the other half, and of a country that would hide this horror generations and generations after.

The truth is denied, even today, by omission, and by the vandals who tried to erase, yet again, the actions of hatred that define this small town. Not a word is written on the monument about who murdered the Jews. Until the sign is correctly written, until Jedwabne recognizes that it was their hatred that murdered their fellow townspeople, the name and town of Jedwabne will carry its shame and we will remember. To the 1500 hundred Jews murdered by the people of Jedwabne out of hatred and anti-Semitism, may your memory be blessed. To the town of Jedwabne, may your town be remembered in shame and to those who vandalized the monument, may all the work of your hands be as cursed, may your souls be cursed for your desecration.

You can read about my other breaking point, if you like, here.

There's an article on the Arutz 7 website about women in combat units. Not just any unit - Elie's unit - # 55. And not just any women - three commanders and a soldier and the complaint they filed with their commanders...and then leaked to an Israeli reporter. The soldiers are against the army's handling of some incoming soldiers (a unit of religious soldiers who do not want to serve with women). No, these incoming soldiers weren't asked and didn't voice any opposition. Before they even come into the unit, the army is preparing the way by removing the women to other units. The women are angry and feel the men should go elsewhere.

 

When Elie entered the army, he was asked if he was willing to serve with women. He told them that he preferred not to - serving in a combat unit puts soldiers in very close quarters; the Israeli army is a very physical one. I cannot tell you how many times I saw soldiers pat each other on the back, give a quick hug of greeting or to say goodbye. Hugs when they finished training; hugs when they said goodbye for a week's vacation after the war ended. It is an amazing site to see, to realize it is done with such affection. This was what Elie felt was inappropriate between a man and a woman and so he opted out of this.

 

After being in the army for a year, finishing his basic training, advanced training, several months on a combat position and then the Commander's course, he was asked to command a unit of incoming soldiers. He was thrilled. He trained, he prepared...and then the night before he was to travel to the training base, he was told that his unit had female soldiers.

 

I wrote about this experience (Two Rights Don't Make a Wrong), after agonizing how two rights could be wrong. Elie should have the right to his religious beliefs; women should have the right to serve, if the army feels they can. We have a friend whose daughter went into an artillery combat unit. During basic training, she was carrying another soldier (a female). She dropped the other soldier on her leg - both were injured, but our friend's daughter was hurt more seriously. She shattered the bone in her leg in three places and it took her many, many months of pain and rehabilitation to get back to where she was.

 

I discussed this article in today's news with Elie, curious to see how he would react. He was annoyed, impatient. Please excuse his use of the word "girls" here - he doesn't mean it in a nasty or derogatory way. Elie did not think of these girls in a sexual way but rather as a commander with added complications that, to his way of thinking, did not deliver justifiable value.

 

That's not to say that he does not see a place for women in the army - there were many roles that they fulfilled with honor and equaled any of the contributions made by males. But he has little patience for those who feel it necessary to go against the army by leaking their complaints to a reporter, especially the one these female soldiers chose. To Elie, this is a betrayal of an army that has done a tremendous amount to find ways to accept the tremendous service these women wish to give.

 

Here's what Elie said:

 

When I was there, there were three girls in the unit - 5 in the whole battalion. And they want to bring in 100 soldiers. Simple math 5 girls or 100 guys. 

Half the times the girls can't do a lot of the physical things. It's very nice that they want to be there, but to be realistic, they don't do what the men do; and they can't do what the men do. Besides the fact that the commanders have to work 10 times harder to make sure they have what they need, enough separation to ensure their privacy, for 2 girls to have a separate room, separate bathroom. So all the boys - like 100, have to use 1 bathroom so that 2 girls can get their own.

 

t makes sense to have them in the army, and there are places that you can deal with this and places that you can't. You have units that are 50%

men and 50% women like the one that is "light combat." (Here, Elie used the Hebrew word and when I asked him to explain, he came up with the term "light combat) and then explained that this includes those responsible for many of Israel's borders. Doesn't sound light to me!)

And then, Elie continued, you have units that have no girls at all (which is most). And, most of the girls that go into Artillery combat - most don't stay in combat. They drop out and then they fight the army to release them after two years instead of the three they needed to promise to complete in order to get into combat.

 

A few do really stay for 3 years, but often they get hurt and while they're 3 years in the army, they still have to leave the combat units. And some have the motivation but because of injuries are going back and forth, in and out of combat units because they were hurt trying to do something that was too physically challenging.

Sadly, this Carmela Menashe has become someone that everyone goes to cry to, instead of trying to be realistic and deal with it and then she blows it up.

 

Elie was called upon to be a Commander of incoming soldiers and both times it was canceled at the last minute because there were women in the new units. There were to have been units that remained only men, enabling the religious soldiers to serve separately, which is their right. The army messed up - it was headed for this problem when Elie was there because instead of designating a single unit that would include men and women (or one for men only), they alternated which units received the women until there were no units left.

 

There are many places where it is completely possible, from a physical point of view, to have women serve and there are some jobs where it simply does not make sense. Lifting heavy artillery shells is one place where this service is of questionable value as compared to other places that require more brain than brawn.

 

The army has a fundamental responsibility to respect each soldier and to balance that respect with the needs of others. Where they succeeded for Elie several years ago, they now seemed to have failed. It's sad to see - even sadder to see that these soldiers chose to resolve their complaint by going outside the army, to a reporter than is known to love reporting all the wrongs of an army that remains, always, at war, at alert.

 

For Elie, in the simplest of terms, it becomes an equation - the need to bring in 100 soldiers against the needs of these four. He feels badly for the four but the lesson I learned in my first months as a soldier's mother is that  though the army is made up of individuals, it is the singular need of the army as a whole that prevails.

 

Harsh, it may be - but necessity breeds the reality in this case. I didn't argue with Elie - I wanted his opinion and he gave it. Perhaps in a few years, he would put his words in more politically correct or gender neutral terminology. For now, it is likely he speaks for most of the artillery soldiers, whether that makes these female soldiers angrier or not, it is important for them to understand.

 

According to the article, the female soldiers sent a letter to their commanding officers. The army has not made a final decision - and yet the soldiers felt justified in leaking the contents of the letter to a gossip-loving reporter who read the entire letter on the radio.

 

What the female soldiers forgot, was what Elie wanted them to remember. Their commanders have worked hard to help them get to where they are; accepted less than what the men would do because he accepted that they did their best. They have made the conditions of the men harder, in order to make their conditions better. One hundred men will use a single bathroom, so that one can be dedicated to women; same with the showers. Where there may be 10 men in a room, there will be only 2 women in the same size area.

 

The actions of these women in going outside the army, is a betrayal of everything their commanding officers have done to enable them to fulfill their dream to serve in this way. Elie wanted to be the commander of incoming soldiers. He had trained for it, was looking forward to it. It never occurred to him to ask that the army place the women somewhere else. He only asked that he be removed and given a commander's job somewhere else.

 

For the good of the army, the unit, the soldiers, Elie moved to another unit. I wish I could believe these women were acting for the same interests.